nothing is ever created or destroyed

I’m not the first one to say it’s like swimming underwater. Can’t breathe, collapsing lungs, silia no longer moving as everything slows down. Flowers unblooming, rain moving upward, bread unbaked and collapsing. I’m not the first one to say my eyes are glazing over like a teenager told what to do or a child being abused or an adult being sentenced to more time in a cell. I’m not the first one to feel time slowing down watching the sky as the blue turns gray and the horizon moves closer to the ground and where the nuclear bomb is already on its way and we are locked, plastered, in the shock wave. I’m not the first one to say it’s like a dream from which we all know we will never wake but only a few of us admit that this dream is happening and choose the make the dream what we want. Is this what God saw before creation—is this the loneliness he felt before he chose to make this his own world, chose to birth the stars. It has to be because we are all god, we are all starts and the laws of physics that we imagine tell us too that this will end and that we will celebrate ourselves, celebrate our divinity. Because I am not the first one to say this. We are the beginning and the end. We are now.

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